The Evolution of Spectacle Love

by Brittany on May 20, 2013

in Fashion, Giveaways, I covet

When I was in second grade, the school nurse called my parents in for a meeting. I sat outside the infirmary, but the door was cracked enough for me to hear her tell my parents how concerned she was because she’d witnessed me squinting in the library.

Except when she said “squinting” I thought she meant “squatting,” and just assumed she saw me showing my panties to an entire bookshelf of Judy Bloom books like some kind of trollop. I never bent over in the library again.

Two eye doctor appointments later, the correct definition and my vision became much clearer, and my life as a bespectacled chubby girl with a gap between her teeth and poodle hair began.

Ohhhh honey.

Don’t worry, yall. This is the stuff that builds character and stellar comedic timing.

Since then, there’s been contact lenses, talk of of Lasik, trendy frames, and even some tooth bonding.

While I’m not ready to laser my eyeballs just yet… I’ve made peace with my -4.75 vision. And thanks to the rise of the hiptser, not only do I get rad circle scarves and irony, but I also get killer frame options!

Enter Rivet & Sway, an adorable online glasses shoppe. Much like hippie headbands and Bill Murray memorabilia, I’m a sucker for cute glasses, so I picked out three completely different shapes to try on at home (for free-sies, y’all, this is genius), and now I need your help deciding which style to pull the trigger on.

Cat eye Glasses

Spitfire. A cat eye shape is something I always wanted to try, but I was afraid of looking too Chris Farley in Lunchlady Land. But these tortoise shell frames with a pop of green? Have mercy. Yeah, I just john Stamos’ed over them.  I’m that obsessed.

Round Glasses

Poetic License. I don’t normally gravitate toward round glasses due to my face shape, but the inside of the frame was lavender, so I couldn’t resist. They felt like a more romantic take on Harry Potter glasses, and we all know what a nerd I am about that.

Square Glasses

Hungry Heart. So I’m obviously a square glasses fan. they are flattering and familiar, and if you’ve learned nothing today, I have a hard on for tortoise shell. But are these too safe inside my comfort zone?

Ok so, I definitely have a favorite (meow), but I want you to have one too, so thanks to Rivet & Sway, I’m going to give a pair away to you, too!

Here is how to enter:

  1. Click here to check out Rivet & Sway. 
  2. Leave me a comment with the name of the Rivet & Sway glasses you’d love to win.
  3. Love more than one frame? No problem, leave as many comments as you wish dishing on your favorite styles for even more chances to win.

Bonus Entry: After you tell me what frames you want for yourself, help me pick out mine! Leave me a bonus comment with your pick. What’s the verdict, y’all? Cat eye? Round? Square?

Why I love Rivet & Sway? This giveaway is brought to you in collaboration with Rivet & Sway and Go Mighty. Not only has Rivet & Sway given me a sexy pair of spectacles, but they’ve also generously helped me fund a Life List Goal, to style and dress curvy women! That’s right folks, they have stepped up and helped me launch my dream! As you know I’ve started that process with a national call-out. And now, you can read even more about where I am in the process (and how much it’s growing OMG!) here!

This giveaway runs through tomorrow only, ending Tuesday May 21st at 11pm EST. One (1) winner will be randomly selected, and the prize code delivered upon confirmation of winning.  You must reply to me within 24 hours, or a new winner will be drawn. 

 

 

{ 228 comments }

School’s Out. ALREADY!?

by Brittany on May 17, 2013

in Watch me Procreate

This morning I got up and looked at the school calendar, as I am wont to do two hours before the start of school, and I exhaled a sigh of relief that I didn’t have to come up with snack for twenty kids.

Last month I sent Wyatt to class with a bag full of uneaten take-out fortune cookies. Lazy and unprepared or exotic and educational, I’ll let you be the judge.

But, it was during this last minute snack review, that I realized the final day of school is… next Wednesday? May 22nd? In, like, five days?

What the epic fuck, dude!?

When I was in school, we went until the beginning of June (depending on how many snow days we had), with the last day being a field day, where I spent the entire afternoon pulling pleated shorts out of my crotch, hiding against the fence along the turnpike and trying not to get stung by bees or called on to do a relay.

So, this sudden, very imminent end is… jarring.

Part of me should be excited, because now I can sleep in and not feel bad about wrapping my kids’ peanut butter and jelly in napkins and scotch tape. Downside: I never have sandwich bags. Upside: My kids sleep in like jobless 40 year olds.

Trio

But, this feels early. I don’t know that I’m mentally ready for them to be laying around my house, surrounded by toys, electronics, bikes and trampolines, telling me how bored they are.

It’s parochial school, can’t I sell some thing on Craiglist and pay for two more weeks? Because that would be awesome.

So apparently, I need to go to the store because I need more sandwich bags. And Straw-Ber-Ritas. The official drink of moms who hate summer but love opening cans.

 

{ 40 comments }

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Brittany’s Favorite Things Birthday Giveaway

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Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Bright copper kettles and warms wooly mittens. Brown paper packages probably full of pajama jeans, zombie apocalypse army guys, Moroccan oil, and fake animal heads… These are a few of my favorite things. Two days until I’m “feeling 32,” which I assume will not involve “falling in love [...]

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Last Call Brittany, Episode 3

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If you missed Last Call Brittany live last night, no worries, you can watch it live right here. We drank (too many cans of) Straw-Ber-Ritas and chatted about working, primarily working from home, and you how can land your happy ass a job where pants are NOT required. Speaking of pants, am I wearing any? [...]

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The Post Puberty Super Pre-Menopause Fedora?

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Last week we had an 80 degree day. It’s back to 50 now, so let’s not get excited, but this is how Ohio works. Dick teasing us with moments of warmth and sun, only to pull out at the exact moment you consider packing your winter coat away. The warm weather was lovely, but it [...]

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