Lazy Sunday: Mother’s Day 2012
3. I don't want to wipe anyone today. You know what, including myself. It's not weird unless you make it weird.
Slushy Magic. The best kind of magic.
I've always had an aversion to foods that challenge social norms. Peanut butter and jelly in the same jar, crab in a can, seedless cucumbers....it's all just witchcraft.
Weeds.
They didn't cancel it, Henry died, like in history. The show was about real life, Andy. Please read books.
Knock You On Your Ass Margaritas
You know those margaritas that are so good, you sit there and drink them for hours, having no concept how drunk you are until you try to stand upright and then you hit the pavement face first? This is one of those margaritas.
Fifty Shades of Trying
I have gastric reflux, and we also don't have to tell everybody.
Hallucinating.
OK, I know what happened. I must have been sleep walking, and thought I was going to fridge to drink out of the milk container, but I actually walked into the garage and drank Round-Up.
The end.
People would come here and be all, where's the food, and I'd be like, what food, douche bag?
The Elevator.
Any logical person would be like, oh my God, you should totally not go in there, and I'd be like, you're right.
50% drinking game, 50% Candy Land
50% drinking game, 50% Candy Land
Lazy Sunday: April 15th
I could not put my finger on exactly why, and then I realized it's because I simply haven't been drinking as much as I'm used to. Bingo! To the wine cave!
