Apparently I’m coaching the boys soccer team.
Yeah, I don’t know how that happened either.
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About the Author: Brittany
Apparently I’m coaching the boys soccer team.
Yeah, I don’t know how that happened either.
I have two words for you “Soccer Mom”
I am shopping online for a jogging suit and a whistle as we speak.
Better get a good sports bra…
As the coordinator of a local soccer club, I salute you! Coaches are hard to find. Have fun!
Hopefully you know the rules?
I actually do, I played from about 3rd grade through the first two years of college. But, coaching a gaggle of 4 year olds scares me.
I would be way better sitting on the sidelines, taking pictures, probably hungover.
Ha! Same thing happened to me last year! Worst part…8am soccer games, ugh!
Andy and I both agree, never again, we want to enjoy the games.
I mean, I won’t even BE HERE for half of them.
Andy doesn’t know that part yet…
Yay! Let me know if you need a “Laws of the Game, Made Easy” book ;-)
I have coached 3 teams. With 4 year olds, the hard part…getting them to all run in the same direction. Good Luck!
On the plus side, my husband finds soccer moms totally HOT!
That is so amazing.
Seems weird now but someday you are going to look back and wonder why :0)))
Just kidding, my son is 20 and the thought of coaching him and his little friends who are now big too, on a soccer team when he was a cute little boy is something that would blow me away from where I’m sitting now.
Totally awesome. Have fun. (really – :0)
(and remember, it’s not about who wins the game, it’s about who gets the dirtiest and has the least soccer balls to the head with minimal wailing and gnashing of teeth – yours!)
Haha! Tell me it’s at least the kind of league that gives out “participation trophies”? That way you don’t have to worry about the sideline parents who just want their kids to “win win win!”
So where do I sign G-tot up?
Oh…good luck and have fun with that!!!! I remember when I was elected the team medic for all the football games for my son’s team. They asked if I could help take blood pressures for the physicals and told me they would teach me how to take a blood pressure. I was a stupid ass and said, “Oh, I know how. I am an EMT.” What the hell was I thinking??
I bet you will be an awesome coach and you will have a blast! Besides, 4 year olds don’t know what a hangover looks like and if the parents bitch, you can pass the whistle and sweat pants over to them!
This is amazing. Please get a track suit and a clip board.
WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BULLDOG AND A SOCCER MOM???? LIPSTICKCKCKCCKKCKCKCKCKC!!!! ahahahahah, drink lots of gatorade.
Think of how cute you’ll look in your coaching outfit! :)
Ohh, that is going to be so cool! I am dying to get my 3 1/2 year old daughter to join a soccer league but she keeps saying no and that I should go play instead…little brat! :O You are going to make one very stylishly awesome Soccer Coach!
Totally off the subject — every time I watch ANTM and see the contestant named Hannah, she totally makes me think of you.
Been there – done it. I am the least athletic person on the face of the earth. Luckily, at that age the only things you need to know are:
1. which one is your goal (they’ll forget).
2. Who is bringing snacks.
My favorite preschool soccer memory is of a heated game in which a plane flew over. The ball stopped. All heads went up. A few pointed. Ball still laying there.
Gameus interuptus.
Have fun! http://www.alotoflayers.blogspot.com
I remember two important things from when my former step-daughter was in soccer at four. If they run in the right direction long enough, dumping a bottle of water over their heads is a great prize. And SNACKS. I miss the snacks.
This was the funniest thing I’ve read all day.
Please do not take that as I don’t think you will do a good job. I think you will do a great job. But as someone that said, “sure I’m be the co-leader for the girl scouts,” I am totally laughing my ass off.
I don’t know dick about soccer, but I do have kids. You probably shouldn’t yell fuck a whole lot, the other parents kinda frown at profanity.
When you say ‘whoever is in charge is drunk’ – you know that’s gotta mean you. Right?
Because you ARE now the one in charge of a gaggle of four year olds. Which, FYI, is directly correlated to your need to start buying stock options in wine companies.
My hubby was the basketball coach this year for 3rd grade. He didn’t know much before but he got a book & some dad took pity & helped out. Pity is good.
After the last game, we went for pizza & laser tag. I paid the $180 bill. My son got all kinds of invites. B’s mom said she would watch my kid ALL SUMMER & they have horses. He got invited to be on soccer, tball, & flag football teams.
I’ll say this… that little guy seems thrilled about it. ;-)