We love the sun.

We love the water.

We sometimes forget to shave that one strip on the back of our legs.

And we worry like hell about what the other women at the beach think of us, because the honest to God truth is, forget the men, we judge each other the hardest.  There are entire magazines and blogs and fashion shows on E! dedicated to it. It’s pretty gross and archaic, and yet we never learn and we never stop.

So you see, skinny girls, we are the same. We are a sisterhood of women who fight to like ourselves in a deeply unlikable environment, who experience more body shaming than celebrating, and who- okay fine- enjoy high waisted jeans way more than any of us care to admit out loud.

You know a remarkable thing happened last year after I climbed my metaphorical “bikini mountain.” I haven’t been able to put a one piece bathing suit on since.

Curvy Girl Bikini Love

And why the hell should I? Bikinis make me feel sexy and feminine and I can pee so much easier. Sure my parts jiggle around a bit and my thighs touch, but in the name of Kate Upton, fuck yes. Do I have insecurities? Sure, but when I’m swimming through cool water, or brushing the sand of my skin, or admiring the tan lines I have that no longer resemble an over-sized men’s t shirt, they’re fleeting.

I was recently packing for Florida, and as I haphazardly tossed warm weather items into the open suitcase on my bed, my mom wrinkled her nose and asked why I would take a bikini on a family vacation. My answer was simple, because there would be a pool. I’m not selectively proud of my body, but if there was ever a time to openly relish feeling womanly and strong, it’s in front of my kids and on the off chance that I might see any other woman who wakes up that morning needing to see someone who looks like me to make it feel okay to look like her.

This year I stand before you with 10 lbs more ass and 20 lbs more swim suit confidence, which happens to be a pretty amazing ratio, especially as far as my boobs are concerned.

Polka Dot Bikini

Black Polka Dot Bikini, Lands’ End Top: size 14 /Bottom: size 16

This bikini feels retro glam, a look I’m very much digging this season. And it’s also a great excuse to wear red lipstick to the pool.  Of all the bikini tops I’ve tried on, this style is consistently the most comfortable non-underwire I’ve come across, that still offers some level of actual support. The bottoms are a little lower than my brain is used to processing, but hey, a little above the butt dimple never hurt anybody.

Here is to 2014, another year for us to join up, put our insecurities aside, and rock out with our stretchmarks out.

Feeling nostalgic? Click here to see the evolution of my swimsuit confidence!

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