A true story about mangos and John Tesh.

April 29, 2008

I ran out of milk today, which is a no no when you have toddlers running around, so I had to make a run up to the local “financially rape you because there isn’t anyone else for another 20 miles” super market. Being that I am still a bit sicky, and in need of some […]

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Birthday Weekend: Closing Ceremonies, cough cough

April 29, 2008

Well, how fun, another birthday has come and gone. Thanks everyone for the cards, gifts, flowers and phone calls! It was great to feel so special! Sadly, because I was bound and determined to grill for the past two days, despite the wind…rain…hail…it seems I have become quite sick. I mean, I will still grill […]

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Birthday Weekend Part Two

April 28, 2008

Day two of the festivities started out with massive amounts of cleaning. Hubby invited people over that night in a birthday party capacity, so that meant picking up 800 leggos, turning over kool-aid stained couch cushions, and moving the contents of my “fun” drawer to another, much safer location (I have some snoopers in my […]

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Birthday Weekend Part One

April 26, 2008

It’s here, folks. Today is part one of the three day carnival that is, my birthday weekend. And, I know I am not 10 any more, and the days of clowns and pin the tail on the donkey have long since passed, but, deep down, I think everyone wants to feel extra special on their […]

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Hey Ebay Seller Piratehooker420!

April 25, 2008

Put down your Nintendo controller and ship my new cell phone, ya douche bag! I am sure you are riiggghhhtt in the middle of a kick ass game of Duckhunt (The kids still play that, right? I am so out of touch), but I paid you a week ago, and my current cell phone is […]

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Worms in our bellies

April 22, 2008

“Ma! Derf een moof. DERF EEN MOOF!” Translation: “Mommy, don’t look now, but there is literally two fist fulls of dirt and other organic material in my mouth. Probably a bug or two as well. And I am eating it. Would you like to eat some too?” Gee’s, while it looks yummy sweetie, mommy is […]

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Not for everyone, but perfect for me.

April 21, 2008

Today was a good day. Lately, I find myself with so many obligations. Appointments, lunch dates, mounds of house work, and general rushing around. I always told myself I wouldn’t get caught up in things of that nature, but I’ve spent too many days staring out the window at a beautiful day I could not […]

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Magnum P.I. called…he wants his shorts back.

April 18, 2008

Listen, guy across the street, I am just as excited that it is spring time as you are. Hell, I am down right giddy about it. But, the thing is, man…your shorts. They are really short. I don’t fancy myself a fashion maven, nor do I wish to dictate what people wear in the privacy […]

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It’s not you, it’s me…and your lack of email

April 17, 2008

Listen, if you don’t have internet access and a cell phone, then we simply can’t be friends. And, it’s not because I am a technology snob. I’m not. As I type this, there is literally duck tape holding my cell phone together (long story). It’s because I don’t have the time or mental capacity anymore […]

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The old lady who lived in a shoe

April 15, 2008

Since when did I start giving off the vibe that says “hey, I am a nice complete stranger, please leave your unattended children with me, and I will watch over and nurture them until you return?” I don’t think I look overly friendly. I mean, I don’t look like a pedophile, but I have been […]

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