This is 200

This is 200

I can't sleep. That's a relatively normal thing, really, as anyone who has gotten completely coherent emails from me at 3am can attest. I don't sleep. I have the next round of edits due on my book in, ohhhhhhh, 13 days. I was recently hired by a morning radio show to come and chat every Thursday, the fall session of Camp Throwback tickets go on sale October 13th, and I almost have the perfect cat eye down with my eyeliner. Obviously, I have a lot on my plate right now. So, I let my brain … [Read More...]

Trippy

I am home. We are home. Everyone is home...even that skanky sippy cup full of milk I left on the counter before we left, it's here too. On the plus side, I am relieved to still have the freedom to roam around my house, not addressing the stinking sippy of rotting whole milk, as 8ish days in … [Read More...]

Home!

Thank. Fucking. God. 2 day car trip...both ways? Never again. I completely plan to write something of relevance tomorrow morning, but tonight I must address more pressing matters, like regaining the feeling in my ass, and reminding my husband we so aren't doing it tonight...for reasons … [Read More...]

South Bound

Brunette.  On vacation. With the inlaws. Where the word tuchas flows like wine and Dr. Phil is king.  More to follow... COPYRIGHT BAREFOOT FOODIE 2009 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior … [Read More...]

Blizzardy

I am going to try and make this as coherent as possible. Which is hard, I have lots to do, but am too hungry to do it....plus Henry the pug is snoring so damn loud, and I keep throwing paper clips at him, but he is ignoring me and I think my head may explode. Fuck! I just tried sticking my … [Read More...]

Corner office, flying shrimp

This is a true story of 7 strangers, picked to eat together at a hibachi grill and catch shrimp in their mouths, to find out what happens when people stop being polite and start being real...and by real, I mean totally try and talk you and your husband into swinging with them.So, my brilliant, … [Read More...]

Totally not dead on the side of the road somewhere.

Holy crap.It's Saturday!?How did I not post all week?What was I doing?Thinking back...um...lots of Mexican food...putting rubber bands on all my jeans because they won't button anymore...not cleaning...not paying my student loans...lots of those hard to find cherry flavored things that look like … [Read More...]

Hot pants.

Ya know what, Target guy, I know I look like a crazy person pushing a cart of screaming boys, wearing a black turtleneck sweater, red booty shorts with "HO HO HO" on the butt, and black boots with knee high Hello Kitty socks, but listen to me, look into my eyes, if you don't go in the back and tell … [Read More...]

Steak Marinade

Few things in the world get me laid faster than a well cooked steak....especially when made for dinner on the eve of an OSU game. Such a overlapping of wonderment occurred this Saturday, as I feel the need to check into my chore chart of wifely duties on a semi bi-monthly basis. So, red meat, … [Read More...]

Woozy.

Hello.What's with the shaking and convulsing, you ask?Oh you know, just the after effects of my morning starvation diet in preparation for my 1 hour of fuckinghell glucose test.Not familiar?Oh, it's what us pregnant types do to make sure we don't get gestational diabetes, so that I may guiltlessly … [Read More...]

In no particular order…

1. Pft. I am a tough sell. I've known this for a while, but after your 8374756382940 Dear John letters, it starts to hit a nerve. Bottom line. I curse too much, use lewd language, and set a tone that generally doesn't jive with most publication standards. Especially of the mommy … [Read More...]