Raising Geeks

geek

Growing up, I wanted to have two kids. A boy named Josh and a girl named Mercedes. Josh would naturally be the big man on campus, and when I say that, imagine me saying it the way your grandmother says it when she asks you about school. "How's school, Josh? I assume you're the big man on campus like your father?" Josh's father in this scenario being Dr. Peter Venkman or Jonathon Brandis. Mercedes would be a popular genius/cheerleader. She'd be involved in dance and gymnastics and all … [Read More...]

Signs of the Apocalypse.

Oh man. I should have known I was in for a bad run when Tatiana Del Toro made it into the Top 36 last night, a blur of fuchsia lipstick, runny mascara, a hyena laugh, and sausage arms. Plus, I noticed that my stairs have started creaking every time I ran up them yesterday. Big fat cow? … [Read More...]

Sweet Cheeks

Ok, this is a total Valentines Day must for me, ever since my gorgeous friend Jen introduced the concept to me, I have been hooked, and have whipped them up ever since. Because what is sexier on Valentines Day than eating some hot ass cookies!? Nothing. Anywasted, they are an absolute blast … [Read More...]

And enough.

In March of 2005, I lost one of my dearest friends. My cooking buddy. My business partner. A girl who stood up for me on my wedding day, and spent the night before stuffed into bed with me as we giggled about weddings and babies and boys. She was an artist, a singer, and my brother's fiance. She … [Read More...]

Will birth for food…or like, something else totally cool.

Four days since my last post? Yikes. I was just skimming someone else's blog roll (because you can tell tons about a person from the shit on her blogroll), and there I was, at the bottom, last post, 4 long ass days ago. But, in my defense, I have been super busy doing grown up stuff...and by grown … [Read More...]

Sometimes life only figuratively stinks. This is not one of those times.

I have a love/hate relationship with karma. On one hand, I am all about it rearing it's ugly fist when this old lady took the last Expectant Mother parking spot in front of Babies R Us the other day, and I was all, what the crap, you are old, not pregnant! Karma, you better go after this selfish … [Read More...]

My hips don’t lie.

I don't know what my problem is. I'm pregnant. How is that I keep forgetting that when I go to do super important things like buy beer or kicking the ass of the lady in the make up aisle at Target for completely cock-blocking the mascara section. It is absolutely annoying, because the only make … [Read More...]

Two unrelated topics that bug me in equally irrelevant ways

First off, I actually opted out of watching Big Love live tonight so that I could watch the circus that is the Josh Duggar wedding.I am most amazed, not by the walking, long haired uterus of steel, but by the bride to be.There are two types of people in this world. People who look like sluts on … [Read More...]

Me, raw.

Rough, I know. But honest. These days, this is me. Ok, kinda a blurry dirty mirror kind of me, but me none the less. Snarly hair. Black yoga pants. Tank Tops. This is as good as it gets, folks. Poor husband. I have already given him my complete permission to call Stacy and Clinton of What … [Read More...]

How I earned 4 more weeks of bed rest, aka, why your kids should never be in a position to look inside your vagina.

First off, thanks to all of you who said such nice things (and even sent wonderful emails, CaJoh!)in regards to my husband being laid off. Unfortunately, it's not an uncommon occurrence these days, especially in my area. We are lucky, in that he hasn't lost his job, but is off work for a few … [Read More...]

Buffalo Chicken Soup

I have been tossing around the idea of a buffalo chicken soup for a while now. Lord knows, I love my buffalo wings, but they are super greasy and the little bones make for a big choking hazard for little hands, so I needed to get my fix, and also pretend I was eating something healthier than wings. … [Read More...]