Contagious But Organized

Erin Condren Planner

Ever have the type of stomach virus that renders every poor schmuck that comes to your door a potential caretaker? "I just threw up so hard toilet water splashed up and hit my face and I pooped in my shorts, what should I do?" I asked, holding a towel to my cheek. … [Read More...]

Snowed In With Nothing But Coconut Love

Coconut Oil Hair Results

We've basically been stuck in our house since January 1st, and aside from the uncontrollable sobbing and eye twitching, it's been amazing. I'm like Sissy Spacek in Blast From The Past. There's been constant rainbow looming, online shopping, minor home renovations, and it's also cleared the way … [Read More...]

MUST HAVE: DIY Vintage Hoodie

diy hoodie1

I don't know about you, but I hate to have things all up on my neck. On top of that, I have a large chest, so high necklines- on top of choking me- are really unflattering. Plus I like my sweatshirts with cleavage. I'll own that. So, I have come up with a solution to the dreaded high neck … [Read More...]

Elementary School. It’s not all limos and Happy Meals.

Little Brittany Adult Rules

Last week Gigi's midterm report came home informing me she recognized no letters or letter sounds, and she was unable to write her name. Which is weird because she definitely knew all those things going into her second year of preschool. A preschool that apparently bases it's curriculum on The … [Read More...]

The Muse Project

Lucille Ball

When you are plus size and have self esteem issues, it's not uncommon to hate January 1st. Once I eventually got past the dread of imminent resolution failure and looming hyper-inadequacy, I tabled New Years as nothing more than the passing of a calendar year. No more resolutions. No more … [Read More...]

A Day In A Marriage

Andy and I forgot our wedding anniversary. Then we suddenly remembered the night before, except we both incorrectly assumed it was our 10 year anniversary, which left us both scrambling. Fuck, what is the traditional gift for 10 years? Wikipedia says tin. Can it be Target Gift Cards and … [Read More...]

Earrings for Gigi?

Gigi Piercing

First of all, four year olds aren't in charge of making life decisions. Logically, I know this to be true. I'm the parent. No means no. Because I said so. I walked up hill both ways in the snow to do whatever asinine thing you are trying to weasel out of to play XBox. I'll give you something to … [Read More...]

Outfit of the Day: Winter Coat

Winter Coat

For a few winter seasons, I've been loving the long winter coat from afar. It looked so pretty, but so did my grandmother when she wore it. So, I put it in the pile of trends that would never come to be for me; harem pants, peplum tops, gladiator sandals... But you know what? After 30 years in … [Read More...]

House Rule: In These Bodies We Dance

At Dawn We Dance

How do I teach my daughter to love her body? Good question, I don't know. It's actually terrifying. I have no experience liking my body before age 29. I failed in elementary school. I bombed in high school. College was a blurry mess. I can't sit here and pretend to have any idea how to make sure … [Read More...]

Geeks & Sex Toys

Yo Amazon, I'm really happy for you, Imma let you finish, but Andy Gibbons already makes the best drone deliveries of all time. Sometimes when you are married to a geek, the most brilliantly hysterical things happen. Like robotic vibrator airdrops. Welcome to my everyday life. Click here to see … [Read More...]

Cheers, Betty.

Christmas tree 2013

Having a live tree has been a live, in-home therapy session for my closeted holiday OCD. We had such a magical day planned to go pick out the perfect tree. We'd hop in the car and sing Christmas carols the whole way. We'd walk together down the rows and rows of trees, homemade hot chocolate and … [Read More...]