This is 200

This is 200

I can't sleep. That's a relatively normal thing, really, as anyone who has gotten completely coherent emails from me at 3am can attest. I don't sleep. I have the next round of edits due on my book in, ohhhhhhh, 13 days. I was recently hired by a morning radio show to come and chat every Thursday, the fall session of Camp Throwback tickets go on sale October 13th, and I almost have the perfect cat eye down with my eyeliner. Obviously, I have a lot on my plate right now. So, I let my brain … [Read More...]

Dear Homeowners…

Dear Homeowners, I've been using Google earth and I like what I see. How about you move out and sell all your stuff to me? Love, Brittany, future homeowner (Maybe? Say yes?) "That sounds creepy." Andy furrows his brow next to me at our dining room table. "It rhymes, and it's endearing." I … [Read More...]

The Death of Pregnancy License

Opening this text window feels weird, but also like home. So like weird home. Or, you know, normal home, because what home isn't weird? Anyways, here we are together, on the internet. First of all, I have book mono. It's a legitimate thing. You get it one of two ways. From open mouth kissing your … [Read More...]

Overage Drinking

We spent Easter in a family owned restaurant in Erie Michigan, and as we placed our drink orders at the bar before taking our seats - as Catholics are wont to do - I became intimidated by the requests for Manhattans and Whiskeys on the rocks and Dry Martinis, so I panicked and ordered a frozen Pina … [Read More...]

Frozen Banana Ice Cream… NOT GROSS

banana ice cream

Why on Earth was I so late on the uptake with this? Bananas? Good. Ice cream? Good. Banana Ice Cream? Cheaper than other ice cream. So apparently, you can make ice cream out of bananas. Just bananas, nothing added. They do this weird thing that when you blend them, they turn into creamy ice … [Read More...]

A Couple Days in Chinatown

dearkatejulie

My book is due today, and writing it has been mentally consuming. I'm sorry I have been absent, but I wanted to take a second to update you on where I've been, because it's been a pretty amazing month. First up, a peek at what I did while I was in New York City last week... I ate a human … [Read More...]

Dear Andy While You Sleep

dad and gi

Monday I rolled over in bed to come face to face with my little doll-faced cherub. I am keenly aware of the imaginary clock ticking above our heads, and our time of morning time girl snuggles are fleeting. I touched my finger to her warm little nose and she opened her heavy eyes, smiled softly, and … [Read More...]

Last Call Brittany Season 1 Round-Up

With Season 2 starting up ASAP, I totally fell into a YouTube worm hole reliving all Season 1's HILARIOUS episodes. Episode 1: Brazillian Waxes and Girl Talk Episode 2: Spanx & Skinny Jeans Episode 3: Working Girls Episode 4: Sex & Dirty Books with Tiffany Reisz Episode 5: … [Read More...]

The Evolution of Swimsuit Confidence

Evolution of Swimsuit Confidence

So Friday I did my own personal equivalent of the polar bear plunge, and put up the yearly photo of me in a bathing suit, nay.. a bikini, and it's become one of my favorite traditions. It's like a starter gun to my spring/summer self esteem, which needs to top off at a higher level than my … [Read More...]

Fat Girls in Bikinis… We’re Just Like You!

Polka Dot Bikini

We love the sun. We love the water. We sometimes forget to shave that one strip on the back of our legs. And we worry like hell about what the other women at the beach think of us, because the honest to God truth is, forget the men, we judge each other the hardest. ¬†There are entire … [Read More...]

Riding In Cars With Kids

My First Car

I've been having car issues.¬†Mechanically, my SUV was cherry. Logistically I wanted to light it on fire and push it into the pond. The problem is that I have three children in car seats on a single bench seat. So what, you ask? Oh, you've never put a condom on a dude then tried to shove his balls … [Read More...]