What is so romantic about being paranormally stalked? Vampires, werewolves, witches, ghosts; I’ve read all the books.
Most recently I’ve been reading a book that features a ghost that was living in a witches’ house for a year, unbeknownst to her, before getting a body. At first I was all, “this is so hot, I love him!” He’s respectful, sexy, a little bit dangerous (the ghost is also a witch) and he’s head over heels for the protagonist. Plus, he’s already stuck around for a year so you know he isn’t going anywhere!
My mind immediately went to the scenario where I had a ghost living with me, loving me from afar. So romantic, right? Wrong!
When I’m alone, I fart. It happens and it ain’t pretty. I’ll also scratch certain places on my person that would not be acceptable in polite society. That is most emphatically not stuff I want the love of my life to be privy to, especially without my knowing!
The more I think about it, the less romantic the whole thing got. I began to wonder, is the ghost more of a stalker than a romantically interested party?
Let’s examine the evidence, shall we? Here are some characteristics of stalkers Google was kind enough to find for me:
- Waiting at the person’s home, workplace and/or neighborhood
- Breaking into the person’s home or car
- Gathering information on the person
- Surveillance
I’m not intending to make light of a serious issue, but why do women think it’s sexy for a ghost to linger in their homes, longing only to be with them in the flesh? Do we forget that, at times, we’re not much better than dudes ourselves? Exhibit A: The aforementioned farting and scratching.
For those of you who have read the Twilight books by Stephanie Meyer, you probably remember Edward admitting to watching Bella sleep.
I’m sorry, what now?
You mean to say that he crept into a teenager’s bedroom and watched her sleep all night? I don’t know about you, but I don’t sleep sexy – as proven by the hairstyle I sport every morning a la Cameron Diaz in There’s Something About Mary, you know, without that whole I look like Cameron Diaz part. Not to mention that Edward is a blood sucking vampire currently fasting from human blood. So he’s sitting there, watching her, fighting his hyped-up need to suck her blood and potentially kill her? Well shit, good thing the lights are already off because I’m halfway to turned on, naked and roaring to go! And yet, I didn’t think anything of it while reading the books. The only thing on my mind at that time was where was my dreamy vampire soul mate?
(I just admit it. I read the entire Twilight series, but it furthered my point and if you ask me outside the context of this article, I’ll deny it to the very end!)
But the question remains, despite everything we know to the contrary, why is it that we find ourselves so turned on in the face of supernatural stalkers?
Megan Andersen is your typical 20-something workaholic. That is, if making up stories about her food, imagining dragons while listening to the band Imagine Dragons, and espousing theories on the self-important nature of bananas is typical. She spends her weekdays working in the customer service field, her weeknights moonlighting as Batman – err, I mean, a writer and in between somehow finds time for her horse, dog, friends and the occasional date (in that order).
image courtesy Wikapedia
Yep. That is one of the things that bothered me about 50 Shades of Gray, too.
See, all I can wonder is: “What is this book you’re talking about?”
And maybe we find ourselves turned on by the impossibility of the “paranormal stalker.” We know this could never happen, yet in the back of our minds we allow ourselves to imagine that it could. Someone who is obsessed with us- despite all of the unattractive things we do when we “think” we are alone. It is something to think about.
I keep thinking that about 50 shades of gray. I don’t care about the sex stuff. But he’s a crazy emotionally abusive stalker and all these people are swooning over him. Its so freaky to me.
i think a lot of people see that he is because of his brokenness and terrible past, and see how Ana brings him through that, there’s a real sweetness to her sticking with him and her love helping him overcome that and let go of a lot of control
Re: 50 shades. While we’re at it, when did S&M become so popular? I’m not into being punished, I don’t understand the point of spanking. I cry if I stub my toe. If my husband tried to get freaky like that, I’d punch him and go play Facebook.
I refused to read/see Twilight on principle of the fact that I’m not a 13 year old girl, and vampires are entirely too played out. There’s a vampire show on the Disney channel for heaven’s sake! I also refused to read 50 shades, because ball gags just don’t do it for me.
Are you reading a Hollows book? Is the ghost Peirce?
I totally saw Edward as a stalked when I was reading but Peirce? You just blew my mind-he totally is
I was thinking the same thing. She must be talking about Pierce. And he was totally a stalker.
My thoughts on this are that it’s not just paranormal stalkers, as seen by 50 Shades of Grey. One of the appeals of these books, though completely subconscious, is the control the female lead gives up to the male lead.
Domination, or at least, the idea of domination, appeals to most women in this day and age, on some level, because it means we’re taken care of.
We don’t have to worry – about bills, filling the gas tank on the way home from work, what’s for dinner, or certainly who’s going to be responsible for initiating sex tonight. It takes away some of that soul-crushing responsibility we pile onto ourselves, and we get to escape for a little while.
Would I want a guy to control me the way Edward or Christian did? Maybe sometimes. Sometimes it’s nice to not worry about things. Everyday? Definitely not.
As badly as the 50 Shades books were written, one thing I liked better about it than Twilight, was eventually, Ana forced her way into taking care of Christian too. To me, that was more realistic of a true relationship.
I mean, I get it, both of them are ridiculous fantasy anyway, but Bella spent the entire Twilight series being pathetic and martyrish, only to rock it out and take care of business in the final scenes, without much of a change internally. That didn’t scan for me.
But yeah. I get why we gloss over the inherent creepiness of these relationships. It’s because sometimes, you just want someone to TELL you how it’s going to be.
@sh – I was *totally* talking about the Hollows books! hahaha I still have to read the latest book and the stupid girly part of me is hoping Pierce is in it and he sweeps Rachel off her feet! (I’m going to go ahead and roll my eyes at myself…)
Love the Hollows! And normally I’d roll my eyes at that whole paranormal stalker thingy…but I though the Pierce thing was HAWT. I disgust myself sometimes…then I get over it and enjoy my book cause it beats kid laundry any night of the week!
to all of the “Hollows” readers and Amanda Hocking in general:
My daughter has read everything by AH she can get her hands on. I on the other hand can’t get past the writing. Is this something I need to worry about or is it Twi-similar? (she is 13)
If you like para-normal fiction then you need to read the Hollows series. It is nothing like Twilight. It is good.
DON’T let a 13 yo read it.
not twi-similar it is adult not young adult. (also not badly written and the female characters do not make me want to beat them for being pathetic) they are a great read but it is a rare 13 I would be OK with reading them.
I thought that’s what you were talking about! I LOVE the Hollows books … I devour them like candy. I agree, Pierce’s “stalking” as a ghost is pretty creepy, and given Rachel’s tendency to choose the WORST men for her, I’m pretty sure you’ll get your wish, if not in the next book, in a future installment.
Personally, I want her to get together Marshall, after the shunning has been lifted and she gets all of this “bad boy” stuff out of her system.
You guys need to read the new book. I’m totally keeping myself from tying spoilers right now. Must.not.give.it.away…
what she said. exactly.
I’ve read up through book 8, and I just recently bought Pale Demon in mass market paperback. I read books 1-8 over the course of a few weeks when I was on a break from school. I’m just being stubborn, because I won’t buy them in hardcover …
I do the e-reader.
I know you’re right, but I’m totally going to go look up the Hollows books. In my little world of literature, I don’t poop or fart, and I totally look sexy walking around with no pants. Sooo… Yea…
great thoughts. it’s because we want to be wanted so badly by someone that they would stop at nothing to be with us. that’s the short of it.
Re: 50 Shades:
I finished the last book last night and well, I’m still not sure what to think. The sex was fine (let’s be honest, it was the reason I was reading) and the S&M thing doesn’t bother me. In the first book, I thought Christian was at his hottest, because all of the control (or a good deal of it) was in the arena of the contract, and within the limits of a contract, exerting that sort of control makes sense. I wouldn’t personally ever enter into a contract like that, but it’s contextualized control. In the later books, though, the control began to bother me. Christian’s behavior began to remind me of a guy I dated in high school (and a different guy that I dated later in college) and not in a good way. In reading about Ana’s reactions, I began to recall how it felt to be on pins and needles constantly, to always wonder if I were going to say something that would be misconstrued and cause a fight, or if someone else, unbeknownst to them, would do or say something that would cause my SO to go off. And it’s….not a turn on. It’s a very stressful way to live your life. I very purposely married a man who does not, in any way, behave like that. So I agree with an earlier comment that we have a fantasy of a strong, handsome man coming into our lives, sweeping us off our feet, and taking care of everything, because let’s face it: it would be pretty awesome not to have to think about bills or the mortgage, or sending the kid to college (and giving them the best of everything to boot). But the subtle message I kept getting from 50 Shades was that it doesn’t matter how effed up someone is, or how badly they treat you, if you just love! them! enough! they’ll come around, and that’s not a primer for a healthy relationship, that’s a reason to stay in an abusive one. It’s the same problem that I have with Beauty and the Beast.
The other part that is in play here, is the part where she is attracted to him. It is one thing to be stalked by someone you don’t want to be stalked by and quite another to be stalked by someone you are hot for.
Also, thanks for giving me real reasons to not read 50 shades. I lived through that, I don’t want to fantasize to something that was altogether not a fun living experience.
“It is one thing to be stalked by someone you don’t want to be stalked by and quite another to be stalked by someone you are hot for.”
Yes, there is that aspect, too. When you discover that someone you’re crazy about wants you just as much, so much so that they drop out of college and move 500 miles to be with you, well, it’s quite a rush. Until it isn’t, anymore, and you realize that you should have done everything in your power to make them stay where they were and stay the hell away from you. If someone did that to/for me now, well, that would be a huge red flag. But at the time, I was breathlessly in love and thought it was romantic. The difference between 34 and 20, I guess
Yeah, I’m thinking about doing the same …
Thank you all.
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