As if America isn’t prudish and ridiculously over-conservative enough, when it comes to the sensual and sexual side of life, when there finally is expression of sensuality we are bombarded with images of what sexy is “supposed to look like.” There are so many beautiful photos of women posing in artistic nude and sensually themed shots, and most of these photos have models of a size 4 or smaller. What about the big girls? What happened to “real women” having curves?
Slowly but surely, we are seeing more and more curvy women come out of their closets and clothes to show the world that beauty comes in all sizes. I, personally, am one of these women. I love my body and I love my sexuality. I was born at 9lbs. 4oz. and I fully accept that I was literally not born to be small, so why not share my beauty, brains and curves with the world?
From writing about my sensual fantasies in fiction and poetry, to taking photos that are partially or fully nude, I am one of the pioneers of the curvy girl world that are seeking to break out and make a statement – yes, dammit, I’m sexy, too! True, I may be a bit more expressive, but I know plenty of other women who are fully in touch with their luscious sensuality.
From my neighbor to my sister-in-law to close friends and friends of the family, I have seen and heard what being sexual means to curvy women, and they all are just as kinky as the “perfectly built” sex kitten featured on your favorite porn website! I know plenty of curvy women ranging from sizes 18 – 26 that are fully in love with their looks and have healthy sexual appetites. I’ve heard stories about flings and one-night stands, ambitions to begin lingerie lines and even goals to bring about change to the adult entertainment industry. The mother of my cousin’s children likes to host passion parties for friends, and with curvy women becoming more comfortable with themselves, their bodies and their self-esteem, I fully believe that her business and the luscious side of the adult entertainment industry are well on their way to taking off!
So how do we come together and get this movement really going? How do we change the game and make the playing field fairer for girls with curves? How do we further praise the risk that thick chicks are taking when it comes to being more open with their sexuality?
Look in the mirror. We should take time to check ourselves out everyday and say out loud what we love about ourselves – personalities and physical appearances. After that, let’s take inventory on what we don’t like about ourselves and then decide how we are going to fix it – exercise, meditation, and even total makeovers. We have to first be comfortable with ourselves in order to be able to fully support the next person. We can’t allow ourselves to sit at home and find fault with others to avoid finding fault with ourselves.
After getting comfortable with how we look, let’s make sure we are more comfortable with how we feel sexually. Read more erotica, don’t shy away from those late night shows on HBO and Showtime, and definitely don’t be ashamed of our inner voyeurs and enjoy a little porn every now and again. I personally love watching ecstasy and passion, so let’s pull out the toys and play!
Be free! Be proud! Be you! And most importantly, be sexy!
Catalina Gooden is a poet, writer and visual artist that loves movies, food and puppies. A motley crew of characters all rolled into one, Catalina is bold and unique. Philosophy and history are things that inspire her, and she has a serious weakness for chocolate and cheese! Read more about Catalina on her blog, on Facebook, and on Twitter.
photo credit Catalina Gooden