It doesn’t matter if you just started dating or if you’ve been married for twenty years; romance is romance, and it’s crucial in making our cherished relationships successful.
Romance is the reason we get butterflies when we first fall in love or how we light up when we think of that certain someone. Romance is that energy that can be transmitted with a mere glance or smile. Romance is pleasurable and we all, men and women alike, crave it, and it doesn’t have to be complex at all. Contrarily, the more simple and subtle the act, the more meaningful it becomes.
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Making romantic acts habitual ensures that the smallest gestures of love will fuel a relationship on the road of intimate success.
Recently my husband surprised me while I was on vacation visiting family in my hometown with my children. He called and said he’d be flying into a nearby town, and that he wanted to whisk me away for the night. The idea of spending a night alone with my husband made me have those familiar butterflies in my belly. But, it was the way he acted that made it even more special. He opened doors for me, pulled out my chair at dinner, stood when I excused myself before dessert, and even had a bottle of wine, chilling, back in the room for us. I was bombarded with romance and it felt so good.
When it was time for him to go back to his plane, he sent me a text message telling me what a wonderful night he had with me. I responded and let him know just how turned on I was by his small acts of romance. Too, our relationship has traveled down a more intimate road since this surprise visit that was filled with small (and deliberate) acts of love and appreciation.
Guys, take note, chivalry is not dead! The love in your life would love for you to show her just how special she is. It doesn’t have to be big and grand or cost a lot of money. I, for one, was incredibly touched when he simply opened a door for me.
Physical touch doesn’t always equate to sex.
There’s not always time for a good “roll in the hay,” but there is always time for a soft caress, a hug, a kiss on the nape of the neck or shoulder, etc..
Years ago, when our children were small, my husband would come up behind me while I was washing dishes. He’d hug and kiss me, showing his appreciation for me, and it always filled me with an undeniable warmth. These days we sit next to each other to watch our favorite TV shows while holding hands, or I’ll often rub his arm gently, or he’ll scratch my back like only he can.
Don’t be afraid to say what you mean and mean what you say.
One of my favorite things to do, with my husband, is to lie beside him before we fall asleep and talk. We reminisce, we plan the future, we dream, we laugh, and we tell each other how much we love the other. It’s said that actions speak louder than words, but I’m not entirely sure. I believe that we need to hear how much we are loved, how beautiful we look, and how much we are appreciated. Hearing the words “I Love You” can elevate your relationship, and it’s extraordinarily easy to do.
The words don’t always have to be “I love you”, either. Simple words like, “you rock” or “I appreciate you” are extremely romantic. For example, I recently got a new job and when I came home from training my husband met me at the door with a glass of wine. He took my bags from me, handed me the glass, and said, “I’m so proud of you!”
When I see my husband vacuuming I get a tingle like no other.
When chatting with my girlfriends the other day, one of my best friends expressed to me that when her husband does the dishes, at night, it sends her into a romantic tizzy. I certainly know the feeling because when I see my husband vacuuming I feel the same way. Surely hearing “I Love You” is marvelous, but take my word on it, hearing “Let me help you with that load of laundry”, or the like, is in a league of its own.
When all else fails, a little blue box will succeed.
Years ago I remember this summer afternoon when the doorbell rang and there before me stood a UPS man. The delivery required my signature, and I was left feeling anxious as I signed my name. Once I got the box opened I held in a palm a little blue box from Tiffany’s. Inside was a beautiful heart pendant with a card. The card read, “For my love, and for all that you are. I love you.” It was a thoughtful gift that wasn’t asked for or provoked, and it’s one I’ll treasure till the day I die.
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There you have it, Guys! The keys to having a successful romantic relationship with your lady. Your set of keys are unique. Just go ahead, put them in the ignition and drive; it’s up to you if you speed or decide to take it slow and enjoy the ride.
hit the nail on the head! great article.
Mishelle, I feel like your husband should be teaching a seminar somewhere for the clueless masses of men.
He sounds dreamy.
We’ve definitely had our ups and downs. Who doesn’t? But, his recent actions did prompt me to write this for all the guys out there!!
When I got home from running errands the other day, I discovered that my husband had cleaned and reorganized the basement. I was thrilled! I know it doesn’t sound romantic, but any time that I don’t have to instigate the cleaning (or even lift a finger), I consider it a gift
And I completely agree with the author – a little consideration goes a long way, even if it is something as simple as truly listening to your partner when they want to vent about their day.
Just last night (after some “reaquainting”), I apologized for being “squishy” (I’m overly curvy… I’m in the right place, no?) My husband shushed me and said he loved me just the way I am. I needed to hear that. If we weren’t so exhausted, I would have initiated round two! It’s the little things.
This one hurts a little bit, but when I was with the Ex, I always got this little thrill when he reached for me. Like when we’d get out of the car & he’d reach out to take my hand or put his arm around me. Or we’d leave the house & he’d put his hand on the small of my back. I once told a friend that no matter what was happening, if we had been arguing & were less than happy with each other or whatever, I knew everything was okay if he still reached for me. And I was right. He stopped reaching for me a couple months before he told me he was leaving.
Great article! My husband can be very romantic at times, but when he cleans up the kitchen after dinner every night he makes sure I notice! I guess he is hoping for a reward!
mo
I have to add that a few times a year Hubman looks at me and says, “Honey, you are clearly hitting your patience limit. Why don’t you go on a girls weekend or take an overnight to NYC?”
Getting sent on a vacation from mommyhood is made of awesome and my appreciation is noted.
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