Why it’s so hard for me to be religious.

abortion cemetary 2

This is a personal issue I’ve been struggling with. And, by personal, I mean mine. I can’t possibly articulate, value or judge your beliefs. I can only wrestle with my own. There’s an old joke amongst former Catholic School attendees; you can tell who went to Catholic School because they’re all atheists now. Many of […]

Parenthood & Friendship

Admittedly, I’m not good at making friends. Like, I thought I was, and I went about my life thinking I was, but as I age and people’s fucking filters break down, I’ve come to realize that is not the case. I’ve narrowed it down to two basic, yet contradictory, scenarios. 1. I get too close […]

Smut and Sinus Infections

Any minute now. Come on. Just one more second…. Sneezes into my open mouth. Coughs across my plate. Lingering green snotty face kiss. Alright any moment now…. come onnn….. Yes, good, the kids are all better, running around, wrestling, ready to resume all their 800 extracurricular activities I am stuck schlepping them to, which means […]

Motherhood, Irreverence and Womanism at 4am

Did you know Louis C.K. has kids? He does, two small daughters, Mary Lou and Kitty. Why is that an issue, you ask? Oh, it’s not. He’s a brilliant comedian to whom I would give any amount of money to crawl inside his head for ten whole minutes and laze about on all his squishy […]

Between You, Me and the Goblin.

By the time I was 14, I knew my way around a boy. Kissing, groping, dry humping…hello, Jordan Catalano in the rain, motivation enough for a girl to find her way around a pant bulge or two. You know, everything except that whole all the way sort of thing. It wasn’t for lack of trying, […]

Blanket Apology

Flash Dance

Growing up, I lived in a house with a minimum of 3-4 animals at a time. My mom was always taking in animals, and at one point even had a room with over 100 bearded dragons. Seriously. Having friends over was stressful and required hours of prep work; vacuuming up hair, lighting smelly candles, lint-rolling […]

Tales from the Road Part 1

Curse you fear of flight. I don’t know why, in my head, I envision road trips going better than they actually do. I mean, I know my kids are technophiles and they wouldn’t how to sing in a round if it punched them in the face, but really with the constant need for stimulation, already? The […]