Jesus doesn’t frown on a lot of things, but I am pretty sure he hates airplanes. And the new Melrose Place. That show is horrible.

Next week I leave.  On an airplane. This?  Is where I convulse, shake uncontrollably, and then vomit on my keyboard. I just don’t think it’s natural for things to be floating in the air. Back in the 80’s, when the news was all, we’re all gonna have flying cars by the year 2000, I was […]

The token BlogHer post.


I tried to think of, like, a super inspiring post to cover the details of my life over the course of the last week. But I’m so tired. When I open my mouth, nothing brilliant comes out.  Just…bllleeerrrrrggggg. And what the fuck does that even mean? So, I’m gonna go out on a limb here, […]


I am home. We are home. Everyone is home…even that skanky sippy cup full of milk I left on the counter before we left, it’s here too. On the plus side, I am relieved to still have the freedom to roam around my house, not addressing the stinking sippy of rotting whole milk, as 8ish […]


Thank. Fucking. God. 2 day car trip…both ways? Never again. I completely plan to write something of relevance tomorrow morning, but tonight I must address more pressing matters, like regaining the feeling in my ass, and reminding my husband we so aren’t doing it tonight…for reasons totally unrelated to my numb bottom (for once). So, […]

South Bound

Brunette.  On vacation. With the inlaws. Where the word tuchas flows like wine and Dr. Phil is king.  More to follow… COPYRIGHT BAREFOOT FOODIE 2009 All rights reserved. This content may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means, without the prior written permission of the author.