Road Poetry

In case you missed it, we’re on the road. Driving from Ohio to Florida, because we just really enjoy doing that with three kids 5 and under. We’ve decided to escape for a week or so, which sounds way more romantic and mysterious than… Andy was going to lose his vacation days, my house is […]

Tales from the Road Part 1

Curse you fear of flight. I don’t know why, in my head, I envision road trips going better than they actually do. I mean, I know my kids are technophiles and they wouldn’t how to sing in a round if it punched them in the face, but really with the constant need for stimulation, already? The […]

I Roofies New York

The day before I left for New York, I made an emergency appointment with my doctor. Mostly because Andy woke up to find me hyperventilating in bed, singing Cats in the Cradle, and pricing slimming parachutes from my cell phone. It turns out, I don’t have a fear of flying, I have a phobia of […]

New York.

Feelings.  I’m having so many of them, all pointy and squishy and raw. I’m not really good at doing anything constructive with my feelings outside of repressing them or eating them. As a result, they mostly end up on my thighs, dissolved by xanax, or exploding out of me, normally in the car, often times […]

Las Vegas.

Rumor Hotel

You know in Sixteen Candles, when the Long Duk Dong opens the door the day of the wedding, all hung over after spending the night before drinking and riding a stationary bike with his new style American girlfriend, to tell Jake that Samantha isn’t home, she’s at the church getting married to the oily bohunk? […]