Asides

Soooo….

Anyone else catch Glee last night?

I was just starting to be ok with the new arrangement, and the I wasn’t even entirely hating the new high school people anymore. But last night? You can’t do that to me. Not when I’m already emotional about Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson getting back together (I don’t know how to feel). Not when I only have one bottle of Moscato in my house. Not when I have no cake to be found, and had to fill the large gaping Glee-induced hole with fudge rounds leaving me nothing to pack in the kids’ lunches today as a treat, and had to toss in a few questionable red and green Hershey Kisses I found loose in the cupboard from Christmas. I don’t even know if Christmas has an expiration date, I might have just poisoned everybody.

I mean, really, Ryan Murphy? All the things? You have to destroy all the things at once? Whatever, my waistband hates you and I’m not talking to you anymore.

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Remember when I gave you books to read after Fifty Shades of Grey? (Click here to refresh your memory)

Well, one of the best post-Fifty books I found was Bared to You by Sylvia Day. The only problem is.. it was book one, and I was not emotionally prepared to not have all the answers to this series.

Well, fear not, because the sequel is out TODAY! Finally.

 

Reflected In You

 

I’ve cleared my schedule, put clean sheets on the bed, and stocked up on Visine, because mama’s not stopping ’til this book is done.

In honor of that, I wanted to share a music video from one of my dear, dear friends, Jenny Talia. She is a brilliant comedian, midwest transplant, gifted porn song writer, and honestly, anyone who can swear at me with an Australian accent was destined to be my sister-wife.

Check out her Fifty Shades Tribute, and a warning, absolutely nothing about it is safe for work!

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I saw this wedding toast video on Facebook. It was so cute. Like, I cried and immediately hated all my friends.

But then, I didn’t really have a lot going on, and the kids were in bed, and I had some wine, and then the next thing I know, I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole into a youtube wedding video shame spiral.

Some of it was ugly. Bad quality. Poor choreography. And I get it, MARRY YOU LIKE ON GLEE OMG YOU GUYS HILARIOUS.

Some of it though, was adorable.


The Best. hands down, I loved this, I watched it ten times which says a lot because sometimes I don’t even remember Justin Bieber actually exists.


I didn’t have a Father-Daughter dance, but if I did, I’d like to think it’d go like this.

I love when a group of dudes that don’t look like they could dance at all, come together, and rock the fuck out of some Thriller.

Is it awkward that the groom is 7 ft tall? Not when he can drop it like it’s hot.

And the guys ALWAYS end up out dancing the girls. Every time.

And sometimes, greatness has absolutely NOTHING to do with the bride & groom.

We danced to Into the Mystic by Van Morrison, choreographed by the two bottles of champagne in the limo, and by limo I mean the back of our friend Mark’s Chrysler 300 because we forgot to book a limo. It was not recorded.

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PicMonkey has their new Monster Maker app up online. Having made this discovery, my children have been asking us non-stop to make them “spooky,” “monstery” and “gross” looking.

So, that’s largely been how Andy and I have been forced to spend the last 3 days. We couldn’t be prouder, Halloween is our favorite holiday, and it’s mostly because it’s sweater weather and the kids haven’t figured out they don’t actually have to give us half of their candy as payment for the gas it took to drive them from our rural existence to a populated neighborhood to trick or treat.

Oh also, we saw Hotel Transylvania this weekend, it was hilarious and super good. If you have kids or get off on Adam Sandler movies (like myself), I highly recommend it.

Let’s look back on this week:

Here’s some cool shit I saw on the internet:

Huffington Post picked up my Bullied post. It was a post I hated to write, but it felt theraputic and if it helps people be more keenly aware, worth it.


Thanks to Daisy for showing me the Disney Ladies committing various forms of debauchery tumblr.

So I Married a Craft Blogger… a hilarious blog penned by the husband of a successful craft blogger, that answer the question, WHAT THE GLUE GUN!?

What happens when Google uses Replacement refs.

This comes thanks to my cousin Mike. Politics aside, high comedic value and NSFW.

Here’s a shout out to my friend Chelsea, who took AMAZING pictures of naked girls in the wilderness. It makes me want to climb a tree. Nude. So she can take pictures of me.

To keep up with everything I love, I suggest joining me on Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, and follow me throughout the day on Instagram @BrittanyHerself!

 

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Today I will officially be a dance mom. I never took dance myself, so I wasn’t in a hurry to sign her up for it, but the girl has music in her soul. Everyday is like Footloose up in here.

I plan to spend the day watching Dance Mom marathons and Center Stage (COOPER NIELSEN!).

I am the best goddamn dancer in the American Ballet Academy. Who the hell are you? Nobody.

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