A Day In A Marriage

Andy and I forgot our wedding anniversary.

Then we suddenly remembered the night before, except we both incorrectly assumed it was our 10 year anniversary, which left us both scrambling.

Fuck, what is the traditional gift for 10 years?

Wikipedia says tin.

Can it be Target Gift Cards and leftover Udon soup, because I have both those things?

The fact is, our wedding anniversary has become increasing irrelevant to us, replaced instead by millions of other extraordinarily normal moments that mean mountains more and cost thousands less.

Pregnancies and promotions, first homes and shut off utilities, sex everyday and having one hand on the door with a bag packed; that is what our life is built on. Not 8 hours in a pretty dress.

Our marriage has nothing to do with December 18th, 2004, anymore.

Wait, false alarm, it’s only 9 years.

Huh. Well, we’re horrible at math.

Thank God for a second grader and the tip calculator app.

Just thousands of days of life lived.

So in honor of that, I grabbed my iPhone and chronicled our anniversary for what it really is… one day of nine years.

Click here if you are having trouble viewing this video.

Song: Lucky Now by Ryan Adams

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  1. Norma says

    After 9 years, home, kids and all that jazz… you guys still have sex everyday?
    If so, that is awesome! How do you do it?

  2. says

    Such a great video and a great way to celebrate your anniversary! We’re going on 7 years of marriage in March and so far every year we’ve celebrated the day we got married…when we can (hubs is military, so we’ve had a couple anniversaries when he’s been gone). But I do think it’s important to celebrate the “every days” that have happened because of that one day of getting married :)

  3. says

    Happy Anniversary doll. What a powerful and honest depiction of a real marriage. As someone who has also forgotten my anniversary a time or two with my love; and who also still celebrates with a sincere yearly acknowledgement to my ex-husband, every year on the day of our wedding which, after 10 years, resulted in a marriage that wasn’t– I just want to say that you are so absolutely right about what you said. Life is built on all the small days after “The Big Day.” Somewhere along the line, we realize that it is actually the other way around. The wedding day is really just one small day, extravagant or meager, and its in all the days after that two people find the Big. Bravo to you. So enjoyed your post and will stick around for more!

  4. Linda Allen says

    Happy Anniversary! What a great video. You and your husband are a testament to what marriage /family should be. Thanks for the huge reminder to savor the moments and memories.

  5. Carrie says

    You are one blessed gal! Don’t ever take any of it for granted! Thanks for a touching look into your world! I am more than a little jealous!

  6. says

    Somehow the video couldn’t play so I had to manually scroll it, minute by minute. :-)

    My favourite: the white phone! – hello! and… the shaving over the sink!

    Congratulations, looking forward to the next anniversary post.

  7. Katy says

    I’m not sure there is a more meaningful anniversary gift. I want you to make one for me and my husband! Worth every second of watching. <3

      • Rikhia says

        it’s the damnedest thing investing in a good knife. i thought i will finally be an adult and get a proper knife (instead of the dollar store variety). now the damn thing is getting blunt and i have all sorts of mental breakdowns thinking about chucking it because i paid more than $1 for it. i look at knife sharpening blocks online and they give me dry heaves. apparently, i have to spend $40+ to save a $10 knife. it’s all a complicated mess.

  8. says

    That was a great post!
    34 years here and we were splendidly happy with Wendy’s for our anniversary dinner. Loving, hating and working it out one day at a time.
    Thanks for sharing your world!

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