I’m like a bull in a china shop this week.
I keep knocking stuff over with my actions and feelings and giant feet.
I keep apologizing for things, and I think I am annoying people with my apologies, so I apologize again, and then they stop answering my texts and I’m like, where is everybody? I bet they are together, drinking and eating and talking about how annoying I am with my apologies and stupid big feet.
I try to explain this to Andy, but guy brains don’t understand girl metaphors, so he just sits there uncomfortably, then asks if I want to watch vampire movies or pop zits on his back, anything to make me happy and not ask him to dissect my feelings.
Then, I broke the thingy on my car that tells me how much gas I have, which is shockingly important, especially when you are as bad at guessing as I am, so I spend exorbitant amounts of time filling up my car so I don’t end up stalled on some creepy road in the country, like in the movie Nothing But Trouble, where people are turned into hot dogs.
Also, as of tomorrow, both my parents will be without work, and I had no idea how that would make me feel, but it’s like, this weird sense to like, take care of them, even though I’m still trying to take care of the people I already have, so now I just have more people to turn into weird metaphors.
And, I’m really really sleepy.
I’m not asking you to diagnose me, but if you want to climb into bed and watch teenage romance movies with me, that’d be great, because Can’t Hardly Wait is a great movie that nobody gives enough credit to. I think Jennifer Love Hewitt won a SAG award for it, and it’s the only reason I know who Barry Manilow is.